A good marriage should be applauded and celebrated. Society needs more examples of real love.
Kendra took to Twitter and said, “Slow news day, I guess. Both of us grew up in single-parent homes. We never saw our dads respect our mothers. I'm so grateful my kids get to grow up watching their dad be the best father and husband.” Later, she added, “… talk about real issues. Not a husband and father loving his family.”
Do you ever look around, listen, or watch the news or social media feeds and think “What in the world is going on?
I do, more and more often I must admit. Most of my friends know I’m a big basketball fan and the NBA playoffs are well underway. I saw a story last week and I thought…”What???”
The New York Knicks had defeated the Miami Heat in a second-round Eastern Conference playoff game and after the game, Knicks forward Julius Randle walked over and embraced his wife and gave her a kiss.
That made somebody mad. WHAT?
Former NBA player Kenyon Martin took exception to Randle’s action. Martin, appearing on a podcast, was critical of Randle, saying, “That's the first thing you do? Where is your mind at?” Martin said that Randle should have been focused on celebrating with his teammates.
“We just got done playing a hard-fought game in a playoff series and the first thing [Randle does] is kiss his wife. That's the first thing you do?” Martin asked.
Since when did a man taking a moment to honor and celebrate with his wife become a problem? Well, Randle’s wife Kendra took note of Martin’s comments and didn’t go quietly. (Many wives don’t – mine wouldn’t).
Kendra took to Twitter and said, “Slow news day, I guess. Both of us grew up in single-parent homes. We never saw our dads respect our mothers. I'm so grateful my kids get to grow up watching their dad be the best father and husband.” Later, she added, “… talk about real issues. Not a husband and father loving his family.”
Amen to that, Kendra. Julius and Kendra were married in 2016 after meeting at the University of Kentucky in 2013, and share two sons Kyden, 6 and Jayce, 1. Hurray for them and their love for one another.
We live in a world that devalues “traditional marriage” that God intended, and it is a very disturbing sign of the times. The value placed on marriage has been in constant decline, and I truly believe part of it is all the counterfeits that have arisen and that are thriving in today’s society. Cohabitation, same-sex marriages, unorthodox arrangements, polyamorous relationships, transgenderism…where did all of this come from?
I was in an auto shop last week getting a brake job and The Price Is Right game show was on the TV. A male contestant spun the wheel and then took a moment to thank his husband who was watching from the audience. No one raised an eyebrow or even batted an eye.
The value placed on marriage between a man and a woman has changed – and not for the good. The practice of creating, promoting, and celebrating alternative marriage arrangements has become accepted practice almost around the world, with a few notable exceptions.
Those who resist this are called “bigots,” “intolerant,” “old-fashioned” and more. Sometimes to not accept all these new marriages and arrangements makes it difficult for people to stay in business or practice their profession and at the same time adhere to the tenets of their faith.
You may be aware of Jack Phillips, the Colorado baker who refused to make a wedding cake for a gay couple based on his religious beliefs. The Colorado Civil Rights Commission found that his bakery had discriminated against the couple, but in a 7-2 decision, the U.S. Supreme Court reversed the Commission’s decision. Phillips endured the glaring spotlight of national media, lost a huge portion of his business, and was barraged with hate through phone calls, letters, and even death threats. Yet he stood for what he believed to be right and is still standing.
Many others simply fold, choosing their livelihood over their faith to remain gainfully employed. Sooner or later, many others will be asked - or demanded – to bow the knee at the altar of the new paradigm.
What would you do if threatened with losing your job and your finances? What would I do?
Many argue that “love is love” and these new marriages don’t hurt traditional marriages in the least. I say “yes they do.” I hate to use the old stereotype but you don’t put a shack in the same neighborhood with million-dollar mansions. That shack drives down the value of the mansions. It’s a crude analogy, but these counterfeits are driving down the value of the “real thing.” God established the standards for marriage in the Old Testament and Jesus reiterated the nature of marriage as God intended and greatly restricted the practice of divorce for the early church.
It guided Western civilization for nearly 2,000 years – that standard which defines marriage as a lifetime covenant between one man and one woman for the purpose of companionship, support, and procreation. Some instances were more complicated but generally speaking, divorce was allowed if one or both parties abandoned the marriage or committed sexual immorality or adultery. But look at us now. We have greatly expanded divorce to everything from “She is hard to live with” to “I just don’t want to do this anymore.”
Let me hasten to add I believe there are legitimate reasons to pursue divorce but dissolving a marriage should never be a trivial pursuit. The no-fault divorce, first established in California in 1969, was a trigger that has helped erode the sanctity and value of marriage.
In 1960, about 450,000 unmarried couples lived together. Today, the number of unmarried partners living together in the U.S. is 17 million.
When I saw the interaction between Julius and Kendra Randle, it made me smile. First of all, whose business was it but theirs and second, good marriages should be celebrated, not condemned. When I see a couple loving on one another and being respectful of one another it serves as a reminder to me of what God intended.
Marriage is not a temporary liaison between any two (or more) human beings that can last for a week, or a month, or a year at their discretion. Marriage was intended as a lifetime covenant between one man and one woman, under God.
Let’s applaud good marriages and good love, not hate on them. Seeing good, godly couples interacting lovingly and playfully makes me feel good too. Society needs to see more examples of good marriages and love.